It has been almost a year since I returned from Belgium. As I eye the row of Belgian beers atop my fridge in Philadelphia, I reflect on just how much my time in Belgium has changed me (and, yes, it is more than just my beer preferences).
While I learned independence by going out of state for college and studying abroad in Thailand, nothing compared to my years in Belgium. Especially during the onset of the Covid-19 pandemic, I had to figure a lot out myself. Yet, at the same time, I had to depend on others in a way I never did before. In the USA, I had connections to fall back on if I needed something urgently. In Belgium, I had no such security. Yet every time I was in need, someone stepped in—be it a professor, someone from church, or someone next door. Living abroad gave me the opportunity to see humanity in its purest form, as I was cut from the protective structures I grew accustomed to. It is not that a fellow American would not help me, it is just that I never had to ask. Whereas abroad, I had no choice but to rely on people I did not know for very long, if at all. Life abroad has made me more optimistic, realizing that there are genuinely good and caring people just about everywhere.
Once you live abroad, you never really leave the international network. I find myself seeking and instantly connecting with Belgian-Americans, as well as Americans who have lived in Belgium. Abroad, I could only ever 'be' foreign. Back in my own country, I can straddle two worlds—the foreign and the familiar, the international and the local. I can fit into both spheres, and it is an incredibly unique experience. I love introducing foreign friends to American ones, knowing from my own experience abroad how rewarding these connections can be.
Even though I’m now living in Philadelphia, I have retained my Belgian “mode de vie.” Americans roll their eyes at my willingness to live in a tiny city center apartment and take the train to work every day, and had I only lived in the USA, I would have agreed with them. However, living abroad forced me into a different lifestyle that ultimately won me over.
This sentiment goes far beyond public transit. I also find myself appreciating healthy food more than I ever did, no longer able to handle the intense, manufactured flavoring of many American foods. I am more eager than I ever was to explore the places nearest to me, even if it’s just the other end of the city. Seeing everything—from how you swipe your credit card to how you drink water—done differently in another country has made me incredibly curious about the world, willing to question and explore.
I also find myself unable to tolerate the stereotypically American materialism. Living abroad for a few years is short enough to not be worth packing everything you own, but long enough to really miss a proper pair of winter boots or a surfboard. While I am overjoyed to have all my ‘stuff’ again, I also find myself unwilling to accumulate too much more. I’ve grown wary of excess, realizing that in addition to environmental impact concerns, any further moves will force me to leave most things behind.
This, above all, is the greatest lesson from living abroad—life is changeable, and you never really know where you will be a few years from now. As I live my life in Philadelphia, I know that life is also going on in Belgium. I still know the streets by heart, and I still have several friends there. The thought of moving again does not seem implausible, and the mere possibility of it keeps me feeling too stuck in any place or time. This marks a new sense of freedom, one that I believe only comes from having spent ample time in another place.